Hey Cleatus... Letter to my younger self on the last days of college

Hey Cleatus,

I am hoping that this letter finds you well. You are just now beginning your college career, and I am writing to you to clue you in on a bit of advice that you will need for your future days. Well kid, you always wanted to be a teacher and now you are just days away from graduation. I have a few things that I need to tell you so that you are able to make it through your last semester without pulling your hair out, stressing out too much, or even curling up in a little ball and giving up (trust me… at this point in the semester there were plenty of times you will want to resort to this, you will eventually understand).

Pay close attention in Linguistics and the History of the English Language, heck pay close attention to all of your classes (specifically Geography… take that class seriously or you will regret it when you graduate). It may not seem like it, but you will need this later. Take notes, and study study study. The college of education has based their whole program on the success of their student teachers. Pay attention and save everything. Each one of your classes will contribute an aspect to your final semester. Do not take this for granted. You will slowly complete the work before you even get to that last semester; take the time and do your work. Do not slack off, do not quit, you will make it through. Put your nose in the book and do not put it down until you have completed your homework. I’m serious!! Do not do it! There are many times that you will be able to go out and enjoy your friends, do not use them as an excuse to not get your homework done.

Failure is STILL not an option in our family. Stop with the procrastination now, it will be your downfall in the future. A deadline is a deadline: meet them, do not push it. Pace yourself, and take assignments as they come. If you know that they are due on a specific date, write it down and begin on it as soon as you can. Your KPTP will be this way. Begin on it as soon as you can. Life happens, and there will be events and aspects in your life that will slow you down and almost make you miss your dreams. Do not let them. Sleep and drink a lot of coffee when you can. This will be your fuel for many long nights doing homework, studying, planning, and grading. Be kind to your kidneys: quit the Mountain Dew and Red Bull now! There are other forms of caffeine that are much better for you.

You will meet wonderful people throughout your college education. Take every piece of advice that they give you and file it away. Some of the advice that you are given will come in handy, some of it may not. Either way, they are willing to help you on your journey-take the time and listen to them. Many teachers will be willing to share their knowledge and even their lessons with you—take them! Listen to Dr. Aagaard, “beg, borrow, and steal steal steal.” You will need these lessons, assignments, and even notes. Do not pass up on anything that you think may be useful in your classroom. You will have an amazing cooperating teacher who is loving and supportive. She makes your last year an amazing experience. She will be a vital asset. She is willing to help you with anything that you need; let her help you with anything you need. She has a wealth of knowledge.

I cannot give you details, but you will go through some of the hardest life events that you will ever face during this semester. The only thing I can tell you is that you will make it through it, barely, but you make it through it. It’s May for me now, and graduation is quickly approaching. … in less than two weeks. I survived. I am still in one piece, I am still standing strong. Do me a favor kid, forgive daddy now. You will regret waiting to forgive him because you lose a lot of precious time with him.

When you get to Spring 2014, know that you are almost done! You will make it. You stand strong, you have held on. I’m proud of you kid, you did it! Buckle down, education is all it is cracked up to be. The pay may not be worth it, but the students surely are! Remember just a couple pieces of advice from me— 1. Life is short, enjoy it when you can (but homework comes first). 2. Always remember what daddy taught you when you got hit in the stomach with the baseball bat-“You’re a tough girl. Get up, dust yourself off and go at it again.” 3. Your family and friends are all standing behind you and supporting you in everything that you do. Don’t stop, keep going.

 

“Just keep swimming”

Mary aka Cleatus

(PS. You do eventually grow out of that nickname… let it run its course.)

I can't decide if I want to get off of this rollercoaster ... Post 3

This time of the year can be extremely difficult for many students. I am not just referring to our students, but I am also referring to ourselves. I know that graduation is quickly approaching, and staying focused and determined can be difficult for all of us. Spring Break has come and gone, and the summer is just over the horizon. We tend to feel overwhelmed with all of the tasks that we must complete. We all know that this is a long, hard, difficult road, but the rewards we reap will be extraordinary!

This year, my students and I have been through a rollercoaster in and out of the classroom. We all know that life happens and the best that you can do is take it all in strides (occasionally baby steps if needed).  I did not fully understand how much my students cared for me until a couple of events made me realize it. I’m not saying that I underestimated my students, I was just not fully sure that I had made an impact on them. I was gone for a few days from my placement this semester due to the passing of my father. When I returned, my cooperating teacher had mentioned to me that she had to tell our students where I had been. She apologized to me because she did not want me to feel like I needed to talk about it, but she stated that our students were showing concern when I had not returned after a day or two. Throughout my first day back, many of my students did not mention my absence. However, it was the students who gave me the thoughtful smiles or the comforting words (“Ms. It’s great to have you back.” Or, “Hey Ms. Glad to see you’re doing alright.”) that meant the most.

At the middle school level, we have already helped our students complete high school enrollment. We are preparing them for state assessments and any end of the year/semester finals that they will have to complete. We are also preparing them for their end of the year celebration ceremony. In discussing this with a couple different classes, one student asked when my last with them was. I told the students when my official last day was according to our university calendar. A few of my students seemed disappointed. I chuckled to myself, but my students obviously didn’t understand what could be amusing. I looked at this group of students before me, the same group of students that I started in August with. I smiled and told them that I had started the year out with them and that I would end it with them. My last day, would be their last day. The students loved hearing that. As word spread from student to student that day about my commitment to them they all seemed in better spirits in the classroom. I had questions all day because some of the students couldn’t believe that I would give up the beginning of my summer break to spend their last days at school with them. When my cooperating teacher and I reflected on the day, I realized how much of an impact I have had on these students. We both agreed that these students may not officially be “my class,” but they are my students. There is a mutual respect and admiration that has grown between us.  

As we wind down the school year, many of my students have already shown signs of what we all refer to as “senioritis.” I can also admit that I believe that I am coming down with the same ailment. A group of my students jokingly mentioned to me one day that they “had my back.” The more I think about that, the more I realized that if they have my back then I had theirs too. As teachers, we strive to make sure that we have prepared our students as best as we can for their future. We know that we can only push them as far as they will allow us to. The best thing that we can all do is strive to persevere.

Coninuing Education... After Graduation and Beyond

I have contemplated continuing my education after graduation, as I am sure some of my colleagues have as well. There are many options for first year teachers; we can continue education by gaining our master’s degree in Curriculum and Instruction, Special Education, English as a Second Language, or our content area. I myself have considered all of the options previously listed. How do we make decisions for future education? Do I go for my Master’s Degree during my first year of teaching? If I decided to pursue one area, would I be excluding a possible chance for a different job opportunity? All of these questions sprang to mind all in a giant whirlwind, and I discovered I have planned parts of my future and parts of it have giant gaps.

My whole thought process began by sitting in Professional Development at my placement school last week. As a grade level team, we were all discussing colleague to colleague observations. Most importantly what information would be the most valuable to have from our colleagues observing our teaching. I sat and listened to the helpful conversation to hear so many valuable ideas all in one room. There were so great ideas flowing in the room, but unfortunately I felt like the outsider looking in on part of the discussion. Teachers were discussing what information would be vital to them, when everything that had been swirling in my head came together. I looked at the team of a handful of teachers that were sitting at my table when I realized that they might need a “new” eyes on the conversation. Politely entering the conversation, I gave the perspective of a student teacher looking at their first year of teaching. I commented that as a first year teacher, colleague to colleague observations would be beneficial to me because the incoming colleague might see something in the classroom that I might not have. They might be able to give me advice on the lesson that I am teaching, or something that they see that could use improvement in my classroom. I know that I am willing to listen to any criticism that could potentially help me help my students. My colleagues were helpful for my “outside looking in” perspective. One of my colleagues even noted that sometimes they worry about what others would want to criticize and not critique them that they forget that different perspectives can notice differences that they might not have.

As I walking back to my classroom after PD, I realized that everything that I had swirling in my head (that PD had originally “stirred up”) was tied to what we had been talking about all along. I started my education to help further the education of my students. It does not necessarily matter what I decide to get my Master’s degree in, it only matters that I am willing to continue my education as part of my original plan. I must be willing to further my education, including my PD sessions as well as my Master’s degree, to improve as a teacher. I must be willing to try new techniques and listen to critiques  that could potentially help my students.

My Worst Fears Realized... All in One Day

My Worst Fears Realized

 

The dog barks.

Glancing at the clock, I’ve missed the alarm!

I have forty-five minutes to get to the school on time.

Running around the house like

a chicken with my head cut off.

I throw on the outfit I laid out, that the cat slept on.

Grabbing my lesson plans I realize

the dog has whizzed

on my lesson plans!

My toast pops up

it’s burnt, but I have no time to make new.

Finally getting out the door, I realize

My tire is flat.

It’s a good thing my dad taught me how to change a tire.

Driving like a crazy person, I make it to school on time.

Getting to the classroom,

I remind myself not to get too close to the pee lesson plans.

Students are entering the classroom, I’ve realized

that my students may hate me.

I make them work bell to bell

constantly checking their work and discussing

answers to make sure that they understood what I taught them.

While answering a question, I bend down to get level with the student.

RIP

This sound terrifies me, but I know that my worst fear has come true.

I have ripped my pants,

In front of the rowdiest bunch of kids I have.

It’s a good thing I keep a spare change of clothes in the car.

Time flies by.

Lunch has rapidly drawn near.

As I enjoyed the quiet, peaceful moments in my classroom

my students draw near with lunch time stories,

“He ate 15 oranges! It was ridiculous!!”

Hoping that particular student was not in my room as they all entered from the hall.

The joking continues in the room.

I realize that “orange boy” was in the room with us

when his reward for winning the orange eating contest

was the classroom humiliation due to the orange mess he vomited

all over the floor and one of the schools copy of The Diary of Anne Frank.

I believed the day could not have gotten worse.

Finally getting to return home,

I receive two pieces of mail.

One telling me I have failed my PRAXIS exam.

The other piece of mail is the

only job offer I have received.

The teaching job in South Dakota.

I take a deep breath, count to ten slowly.

Finally deciding that I just need to crawl back under the covers.

I think I’m going to try it all over again tomorrow.  

Self-Identity

Self-identity. I find myself questioning my own identity from time to time. Mostly I question if I am going to make a good mother, or even a good teacher.  As the semester winds down, I have realized now more than ever that I am extremely nervous for my student teaching semester. My observations have been great this semester, and I have had nothing but great feedback. I know that my CT will be there to help me with anything that I might need: help plan, coordinate lessons with the strategic planning guide, classroom management, etc., but I am still nervous. I care about the education of my students; I am always worried that I am going to say something incorrect or teach them something incorrect. (This I must admit is my biggest fear of all.)

My three week unit went very well, and I have been incorporating bits and pieces of it into my semester plan. I had great feedback from everyone that watched my teaching, and I will be making some adjustments because of the feedback. I am extremely nervous for this coming semester, though. My CT and I do not know what will be in the strategic planning guides for the next semester and are on pins and needles waiting to know what we will be teaching. When you are a student teacher (or pre-student teacher) and you are anticipating your next semester, it can be difficult and slightly nerve-racking when you do not know what is in store for you.

… On a different note, I am curious on how to create a safe learning environment for all of my students. I want my students to know that they are welcomed into my classroom every day, at any time they may need it. I do not want any student to feel uncomfortable in my classroom. My hope for my classroom is my students will use their reflection journals to share things with me that they may not be comfortable sharing in front of the class. Many students may not use this opportunity in my classroom, and that is perfectly fine. As long as one student is able to let something out that they needed to get out, then I have reached one of my goals as a teacher.

Recently, we have been discussing LGBTQ young adult literature and how to address these works within our future classrooms. This brought up great discussions among my classmates as to how we would like to address this, or even how it was addressed when we were the age of our students. I left that discussion with many thoughts on my mind concerning my future classroom. I would like to be cautious with literature that could be skewed and cause an uncomfortable vibe in my classroom, but I also want to be able to have literature that is going to reach my students. Again, I want my classroom to be a safe environment for all students, unfortunately what literature that I teach in my classroom will depend on where I end up teaching. I know that there are still some school districts that “shy” away from some of these issues that currently face our students. We as teachers need to be aware that there are many ways that we as teachers if we are placed in that position that we could still reach our students that could possibly need our help. Something as simple as a small sticker by our desk could let our students know that we here for them. We are there not just to teach these students, but we are there to foster learning. That learning may just be that student learning about who they really are, their own self-identity.

Educating Educators

Attending the KATE conference this past week was a new experience for me. Many of the breakout sessions that I attended were great learning experiences for me. I am grateful for the experience to attend such a conference as a student.

            One of the best sessions that I attended was the session on Voice Threads as an alternative to book reports. This free program allows students to record their voices and place pictures to it instead of the standard book report. This gave me a multitude of ideas to use for my future classroom. I could not only have my students use this as a book report, but I could also adapt this technology and use it for many other uses in my classroom. If I used this technology and applied it to my semester plan, I could have my students “record” messages home from Peeta and Katniss to their families instead of writing letters. The students could also “record” commercials for their specific districts and apply them to their group projects as well. Voice threads can allow students to use technology in many ways for projects that used to be traditional. This is just one of the many ways that teachers can update their “old school” projects to something that the students may enjoy a bit better.

            Out of all the other sessions that I attended over the two days of the conference that I learned the most from was the group of new teachers giving advice to the future or new teachers. Some of the things that they pointed out in their session were things that I never considered for my classroom. Of course, one of the most obvious ideas that they shared with us was to “beg, borrow, and steal” from out CTs as well as anyone who would be willing to allow us to take their lesson plans, worksheets, ideas, etc. I have previously had a professor that had told us that, but I did not truly believe him. I did not think that the teachers that we would be working with would actually help us, but the farther I go in my student teaching the more I know that other teachers want to see us succeed. Hearing the “new” teachers advice gave me the understanding to know that what I have been hearing in my classes for so long has been correct. The little tips and strategies can be taken to heart because they do work, as long as they are implemented properly.

            I never believed that I could learn so much from a conference in two days. Things that have taken years to learn in other classes I learned in 45 minute sessions. From what I have learned in those two days, I will be attending the KATE conference again. I believe that learning from other people that are in the same profession is one of the best ways to learn. I believe that it is true what they say, it does take a village to raise a child. With that in mind, it will take many educators to educate each other just so we can educate our students.

The Light Bulb..... Genre Reflection

 

 

     Being in the classroom this semester has been an amazing learning experience for me. I enjoy learning from my students, but for the first few weeks of school it seemed that I was not reaching one of my students. He was trying so hard, but he just couldn't understand everything that we were teaching him. We decided to try some scaffolding techniques with him and have had success. This particular student never hesitates when he needs to ask questions, but he still struggles. I will never forget the day when we found a strategy that worked for him. 

 

The Light bulb

That moment when that oh so familiar hand goes up

His brow is furrowed-he’s perplexed

I think to myself, “Crap, he didn’t get it.”

He looks at me with concern in his eyes when he whispers,

“I don’t get it Ms.”

I try to help, I try to answer his question

He doesn’t understand

Even after I explain it the first time

So I try a different explanation

He begins to get frustrated

I can see the look in his eyes

That deer in the headlights look

He is overwhelmed, he takes a deep breath and lets out a sigh

He and I both know that I am trying to help

I just can’t seem to get him to understand

I try yet another way of explaining

He asks a few more questions…

“Wait, what was the word you used for the main character?”

“If this is the resolution, wouldn’t this be the conflict?”

Yes he still has that look on his face

But his brow is not quite as furrowed

He asks two clarifying questions

They were relevant and coherent

“If he is the main character…, what was the word you used for him again?”

“His conflict is inside himself,… so that makes it…internal conflict?”

He has it!

It finally “clicked”

He really seemed to be struggling, then – BING

His eyes grew wide

His sheepish grin grew wider

His face lit up

“Thank you Ms. That really helped.”